"Our family will base our success on one thing...our impact for the Kingdom of Christ." -Rick Burgess

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

She Didn't Have To

What does it mean to be a mother?

Webster defines a mother as this…

      moth· er 1. A female parent
The Bible on the other hand, has more to say about the definition of a mother.

Psalm 127:3-5 tells us that the role of a mother is an honor….a privilege. We learn that mothering is about nurturing (Titus 2:4). It’s about teaching (Ephesians 6:4), about integrity (Proverbs 11:3). The Bible says that a mother is available morning, noon, and night (Deuteronomy 6:6-7). She is involved (Eph. 6:4).


She didn’t have to.

She didn’t have to open her heart….to play to role of mother to a child that she didn’t even give birth to.

She didn’t have to love her, or nurture her. After all, she had a mother….a mother that shared her DNA.

She didn’t have to stay up nights, or sooth her tears.

She didn’t have to shield and protect or mend the wounds.

She didn’t have to go the extra mile with shopping trips or mother/daughter dinners and parties.

She didn’t have to care, but she did.

Through years of pain, tears, and scars, she tread.

Years thick with hurt and disappointment.

She just kept swimming.

Days, weeks, months, years, of barely keeping her head above water, and still she kept swimming.

Swimming toward the crack. The crack that would lead her into this little girls heart.

This gift of a little girl that she never asked for, never planned for, but accepted anyway. She accepted His plan.

His plans.

Those strange-to-us plans that we rarely understand.

But sometimes……sometimes……He reveals to us what it was all for.

She got to see the “what for” this week.

She is also getting to see another leg of her journey on this earth, unfold before her.

This week was full of the hard things. The hardest.

Her role switched from the other mom to the only mom. (on this earth at least)

Now she has to pick up the pieces and mend the heart of a little girl that has lost her first mother, her flesh and blood mother.

She’ll sit alongside and be there.

She’ll be there on the sideline like she has been for over 10 years.

She’ll be waiting patiently for the sign.

The sign that says the crack in a little girl's heart is opening.

Opening wide enough for her to swim through.

Through to the deep part where the roots grow.

Roots that grow friendship, grow family, grow love, and grow the fruit of  joy shared between a mother and her daughter.




Motherhood is not a chore or an unpleasant task.

It is a gift.

If you are a woman who has been blessed with this gift, don’t take it lightly or for granted.

This role that was chosen for you carries with it great responsibility and each women has come to this place in the road via greatly different routes. Some easy, some hard, and some just plain ugly. Nevertheless, God has a plan for mother and child. It’s our responsibility, as the mothers of these blessings, to choose the road less traveled. The road He has laid down before us. He’s already given us the map.


“I’ve told you all this so that trusting me, you will be unshakable and assured, deeply at peace. In this godless world you will continue to experience difficulties. But take heart! I’ve conquered the world.” John 16:33 (The Message)




*Today’s post is dedicated to my dear, sweet, rock of a friend who shall remain nameless, and to her daughter. Her daughter, not by birth, but by CHOICE. I love you both dearly. You are always in my prayers.


Linking up with Kris @ AlwaysAlleluia.com


  1. What gracious, loving words of truth, Tracey. Beautiful. Thank you for linking this up. I'm so thankful I got to read it.